Guts

Lately I have been thinking a lot about artists- there is something about artists and the 'fraternity' which is unlike any other groups I have come to know. I am not speaking from an expert viewpoint nor am I speaking as an artist per se. I am speaking from a place of, as Andrew James Campbell is fond of saying 'slipping glimpses'- so it is through the very limited encounters I've had with artists, that there is a reason for the fraternity- a 'sticking together'. My sense is, in real artists, each person puts so much of themselves- of their guts- in their art. Every authentic artist knows this- so it is not surprising that I feel they have a propensity to 'close ranks'. This is unlike any other profession I have come across. Not only do they put their guts/ dirty laundry/ emotion/ psychological being in their art, a lot of them is courageous enough to put themselves in an exhibition- for all to see, to scrutinise, to pass judgement, to meet subjectively. In my view, that takes a lot of guts to do so; a lot of self-believe. I met with an artist, Tom, who recently told me that at the age of 55, he decided to follow his vocation as an artist- starting from scratch. Prior to his life as an artist, he had been in television and producing tv shows. Anyhow, I remember him saying 'never apologise for your art' and that has stayed with me. In particular, the sheer amount of commitment and belief in what you do. In that place, it is the process that counts, not other people's judgement. So that's where I've been- reflecting on my own actions, guts and self-belief. I am also aware of my lack of 'fraternity' and how nice it would be that sometimes, it is nice to have people on your side, to 'close ranks'. So I look at this fraternity and I am suddenly aware of probably never being admitted to this 'club'.