Harmony

I am writing this blog sitting on a train from Milford to Grand Central Station in New York City. We have been spending four days with our colleagues in the US and Canada on a special retreat updating each other on how we have been working with our programme- the Leadership Development Intensive (LDI). It has been a very intensive time together- connecting, sharing and learning.

 
Our colleagues, Lynnea and Michael in Milford generously opened their house to all of us which made the gathering extra special because of the homely and intimate environment. Michael is a fiendish cook. We were blessed with three straight days of the most incredible weather. Each day greeted us with the most amazing sunrise. I took to walking in the mornings with Plum- enjoying her bright chatter, great conversations and walks along the water’s edge. Truly magnificent.

 

And---

in the midst of all of this, Harmony. Lynnea and Michael's two cats of which one in particular, Harmony, sat and slept on my bed every night while we were there. She is more mamacita than feline. So to move her off the bed was nigh on impossible. My unconscious kicks in the night were met with a big soft ball of fur----and my remorseful ‘oh god, sorrys...’ were met with a few mere twitches of the ears. Unusually for me, being more of a dog person than a cat person, I was surprised at how much I connected with their spirits. I felt I ‘understood’ their energies and ‘read’ their needs and for the first time in my life, felt close to the spirit of these cat-beings. What a great life! Harmony sat on the bed, purring and curled up pretty much all day, wandering around when it suited her, ate- or not- when it suited her.  Most of her time was spent calmly looking around, washing herself, padding around and enjoying being stroked and tickled. WHAT A LIFE! I learned so much from her. Being with her also helped me to connect with the playful and wonderous child in me- to be silly and cooing. I took to this ‘mantra’ for both Harmony and myself---‘I am a cat, I am a cat, I am nothing but a puddie tatt...’ Meow! As I laughed at my own silliness, my mind wondered what connecting with the ‘feline’ in me will bring...I’m smiling...like the cat with the cream. Meow!

9/11 Memorial

The whole area was smaller than I had imagined. It is still a large building site. A big tall glassy tower is being constructed that is suppose to be the 'new' WTC equivalent. South Pool. Large. The water was mesmerising. Fire. Water. Thousands and thousands of running beads of light----glassy, cascading golden crystal  beads running towards a flat spreading pond of moving water---water slowly pouring into a large, black VOID. This large hole is like a permanent dug grave, open, waiting- it's cold open mouth gaping. The POWER of this BIG BLACK SQUARE HOLE came from it's hollowness- it's dark absence draining life from the liveness around it. What intrigued me was the contrast between the hurtling liveness and the black lifelessness of the draining void. This black void left me with a quiet unease. I am puzzled and disturbed by it's power. I wonder how deep this space is and why it is a memorial. Perhaps it is fitting how this void commemorates both the dead and the missing- the absence of life that once was and how life in this city will forever be marked by an empty space and how, for some people, this void could and would never be filled.

Photo taken on 23rd January 2013, 9/11 Memorial.

Follow-through and Breakthrough

The word 'breakthrough' is used with some frequency in the business world. In the past, I had some issues with the differences between change and breakthrough. In the context of New Year and New Year Resolutions, I was wondering about wishes I had/ have for myself, for my work, for friends, for colleagues and for clients...nothing came to me. I felt quite flat- lacking in any excitement for the year ahead. I could have lied to myself and just labelled my state of being as being 'peaceful' or 'open' or something like that. But the reality was/ is that I have a pervading sense of flatness. During this time, I made a BIG investment in a new laptop and in the course of tranferring all my folders and files across from the old machine to the new one, I came across many photos, paintings and drawings I made in the last few years- I was in a particularly fertile creative groove a couple of years ago and spent many hours taking photos, drawing and painting. As I looked through them, I was struck by how much I had produced and how lovely some of them were/ are. I could also see that something nascent- glimmers of emergent themes and images nestled in the mishmash of 'stuff'. I was also aware of how differently I felt about them as I looked at them in January 2013 compared with December 2011- I did not see then what I saw a week ago. Then I wondered why I stopped- I was busy- yes...but I think the real reason for stopping was a lack of inspiration and a feeling of not getting anywhere- that I was stuck in a pattern- I could not breakthrough to make better art because I was busy, I did not have the skill, I lacked techniques etc etc. The truth was, I felt stuck, dried up and a bit lost. A few days ago, we made a final project review/ presentation to a client company and we commented to say that the client system had a pattern of 'lack of follow-through'. In my discussion with John afterwards, I described the importance of follow-through in many sport. I remembered the hours of tennis coaching I had and how it was stressed to me that power came NOT from hitting the ball hard but on the follow-through of my swing. Connecting all these thoughts, I started to wonder about the relationship between follow-through and breakthrough. My dear dear friend, Janet, who runs a very successful business said to me on New Year's Eve- that just when they thought they could not carry on any further, they found the strength to just carry on a little bit more and that was when things started to happen and their business broke through to a new level. Maybe my school teachers were right- maybe 'sticking at things' is the rite of passage for true potential to be realised.

Emerging themes for 2013:  Perseverence, follow-through, momentum, building, realisation.